Category Archives: Environment

Why this video, & my disability links in with BDSM

This is a DDN (nope not Daddy Dom Never) but Double Down News Video on UK education 

Observing my education. I was privileged.  My parents where working middle class in reality, working in the public sector they saved and purchased a house, saved and and sent their kids to independent schools (Private Schools) rather than state. With a chronic condition, I was in and out of hospital, moved from infant (prep school) to one private school for most of my education, which focused on achievement and discipline and competition (very conservative).

Go to college, learn to drive,  get a job, work for the big business or go into high paid jobs.Other people will do stuff for you if you give them money. Some choose to go into what are still lower paid professions. OR do not have those privileges and thus are in circumstance due to inequality. And have kids. In other words, be a good drone for society, and you’ll be rewarded. And lied to, deceived, and given false truths and news.

In and out of medical facilities the school did very little to support me, and indeed didn’t notice, or didn’t contact my parents when I was absent for a week or so, nor did they send any support.  
I moved onto another school, mostly focused on a much more art and action b
based education (look up Steiner Schools). While in hospital I was in an out of hospital school as well, something that our Conservative government tried to scrap!
From then I moved onto state school and university to complete my studies.  I had the privileged, mostly capitalist view of the world, although I was never that happy with the world.
 Inequality  was never in my eye until I was a little older but I could see that Equality, was a buzz word that was unachievable to humanity in its current form. And still is.

So WHY is this video relevant to BDSM and education.  Most education is loosely still based on that. As a species, on the whole we teach our young in that same capitalist method, that THINGS AND MONEY, are the key to success, that you have to be better than others, even if equality and diversity are thrown around as buswords.

DIFFERENCES, including BDSM are still seen as ‘weird’ or not normal. And while the freedom of sexual expression is fairly open in the UK, there have been moves to remove some of that. To add more control of our lives to the state. Without my mixed education, I would NOT have had the opportunity to advance, to change, to learn about myself. In other countries, the state still abhors or punishes those that do not meet the conformity, often under the guise of false news or religion.

I live in an area of poverty, thats a gov fact, in fact people have houses, drive cars. But it a background of crime, links to sex trafficking, drugs (in some areas) and the worst health poverty in the area. The local council, mostly conservative is good at greenwashing itself, and encouraging people to be ‘part of the community’ while there’s nothing wrong with that, those ‘getting involved, are a small minority.

We cannot have education that continues teaching the 9 to 5 wealth and breeding program if we want to survive as a species. Because its the only opportunity taught to children, it needs major educational change to break the pattern.

So, watch and share double down news, talk to your friends about it. ARGUE with your friends about it:) Be your own government! 

Why I don’t take part in social media questions!

You’ve all seen the posts. The latest I saw was ‘Name this DJ?’  Often you’ll see What is your? Name This? Have You ever.

Lets look closer at these kind of profiles. The name, may or may not be genuine. My latest was 107 Rewind Radio, with a bubble caption ‘Your allowed to meet your 18 year old self, your allowed to say 3 words, what would you say?’ 107 is a genuine radio station, one of my friends liked, saw, shared etc.

Why do I need to answer this? I don’t, in fact I generally ‘Hide All’ on facebook, and on other sites, including BDSM sites, I don’t feel obliged to ‘Love’.  I’m not there to add, give 2 seconds of appreciation or WASTE MY TIME on something that will be gone ‘downstream’ in a day. 

Its important to remember Just Waste Time, and relax sometimes.  But the rest of the time, cherish the seconds! 

Selling kinky stuff online – Why Fetlife Wins!

Theres some stuff I’m just not using any more.

Various metal cuff sets. A couple of nipple play sets, Story of O DVD’s and The Pet, and soon to go, some ‘Battle Trousers’ cosplay that I’ve barely worn and just don’t fit.

This is all stuff I might have used with ’new subs or photoshoots’.  As this seems unlikely to happen at the moment, clear the clutter! 

Selling on eBay has become a pain, apart from their endless emails and push to relist, my listing software is no longer supported and going through there website is a slow and frustrating process.
And FB market place is just too fussy, and public! 

UK Kinky Things for Sale on Fetlife is what it says on the tin.  Just a group for selling stuff.  No Damn Fees, no ‘This isn’t suitable for eBay messages.  You DO need a FetLife account, (if your a ‘Fetlife lifer’ like my good self, its not a problem

So, if your on Fet.  Don’t bin it. Sell it.

Aaaaargh I got tagged – Happy Halloween

Thank You MrsW on this Darkest most Delivilish Day!

Person in Black Long Sleeve Shirt Holding Black and White Painting

Well this is a merry pickle, read on down for the rest and a couple of enjoyable and useful links! Lets hope you find this horribly entertaining and educational!

Alright folks, let’s get started.

“In order to take part in this tag:

Thank the blogger who tagged you and link their post
Put the rules after an introduction, then answer the 13 questions
Tag 13 more bloggers to participate in the game”

OK I don’t actually KNOW 13 bloggers so consider yourself lucky! Or consider yourself Tagged if you care to dare. If you don’t give a monkeys, thats fine too!

Use these same Halloween questions, or create new ones of your own
Now time for the questions. FINALLY!

What’s your favorite thing about October or Halloween?

Firstly, Happy Samhein (pronounced Sowien). The traditions of All Hallows, or ‘All Saints’ goes back a long time in Ireland and the UK (I suggest you look up the Story of Stingy Jack). The full background behind Halloween seems to be lost. ‘Jack O Lanterns’ were originally carved from large Turnips, but Irish Settlers in the USA discovered pumpkins were much easier to carve! And that my dear American Friends is why you enjoy so many pumpkins.
Traditional Jack O Lantern
File:Traditional Irish halloween Jack-o'-lantern.jpg
(Traditional Jack O Lantern)

I’m British so while ‘All Saint’s is a Christian festival with special church events, Hallloween isn’t celebrated in the commercial way as it is in the USA. We’re all pretty much living in a nightmare anyway.  Like most recognised religious festivals in the UK, and world, its adopted from from  various local existing practices, folklores and religions. Often in order to convert people to the practice of the day!


Black Spider

How much do you spend on Halloween? 
Nothing! When I was a kid we used to get sweets or maybe do a bit of decorating in the front garden. Costumes were pretty much adapted clothing or the odd charity (thrift) store job.

In the UK ‘Bonfire Night’ is celebrated in a few days time on the 5th of November where Brits celebrate the prevention of Religious/Political terrorist attack on our Parliament Buildings (Basically the Brit Equivalent of the Whitehouse, but older! ) Traditionally an effigy of the plotter ‘Guy Fawks’ is made and burned on the 5th, alongside fireworks, either in back gardens or at special events. Although most of these will be cancelled. Some venues are putting on laser light displays instead. ‘Remember Remember, the 5th of November, Gunpowder, Treason and Plot ‘ is a very old rhyme thats repeated even today. So quite often any celebrations are combined, I’ve already heard fireworks

But why not Check Out How Halloween is Celebrated Across the Globe?

A Modern Day Cornish ‘Jack O Lantern’
Source Wiki Click for More Info

What do you think the average person (Average American?) spends on Halloween goodies & does it match what you spend?

Probably too much especially if costumes are single use or plastic/polyester. Halloween for me was a bit of makeup /maskand some altered clothing! But are we talking in the US or Europe.

Does social media influence how much you decorate for Halloween, causing you to spend more?
Eh? May the demons of hell consume your darkened soul! Social media is one of the 9 hells, manifest on earth! 

Do you buy or create your Halloween costumes and what was your favorite costume so far?
See above.
Although if you want to see the very best costumes try watching the Halloween Specials of the UK show ’Strictly Come Dancing’ minimal this year their past costumes have been the most excellent. See other about my own Halloween shenanigans

Share a trick you have played on someone at Halloween

As kids we slightly changed our costumes and went round twice trick or treating to the same houses. Greedy little devils that we were! 

Do you have a favourite Halloween treat?

A full moon, and a candle! Or a nice nighttime walk in the forest. Sooo much possibility.
Oh and the Strictly Halloween Special is pretty spine tingling, tho toned down this year.
I’ve linked to 2019 above. You’ll love it! (The US version is called Dancing with the Stars)

What is something you can do with a pumpkin once Halloween is over? For the sake of our wildlife and planet, don’t waste your pumpkin. The Facts are out there! Unlike the shit thats going on in the US election, I mean why oh why!)

Do you consider pumpkin a fruit or a vegetable?
It’s a fruit, botanically, but it’s sold in the veg section. Tomatoe Tomato!

Jack O Lantern Beside Candles Halloween Decor

What is the scariest food you’ve ever eaten?

Probably potato salad. Its suspected its what resulted me ending up in hospital with food poisoning some years ago.! 

Do you have a favourite Halloween drink?
No although a little tipple and a toast to lost souls is traditional. So far over 15 people I personally know have died. I have a list. It includes lovers, colleagues, and friends.
I might have a sip of Red Wine tonight or it might be Dark Rum

People usually spend money on Halloween, but have you ever made money related to this holiday? I’m getting bored now? Can we sacrifice someone?

What’s your favourite scary book or movie?

Film : I don’t really go for thrillers but ‘Captivity’ is probably one of the scariest movies I’ve seen. Its gruesome! And one of the few films I wouldn’t watch twice!

Book: I remember reading a book as a kid that involved an ‘automated’ Shopping Mall that didn’t allow a family to leave. Terrifying! 

I’ll leave you with some suitable Dark Music for the day.

Stay safe! The Demons are loose!
Adrian has created 2 of his own languages as well as producing many many tracks of music which are free for non commercial use (although obviously great talent is to be appreciated) I highly recommend checking out and buying his music.

Behind the lack of content – Health

Apologies dear followers for the lack of content, I know you are few but enjoy reading!
I’ve been struggling a bit to feel sexy enough to write, and other stuff has got in the way.
I’m also suffering from Low Calcium, theres not a lot I can do about that apart from try and get more sun, and eat calcium rich foods. Sadly you won’t see me in shorts and a T shirt with the temp at around 6 C.

Severe symptoms of hypocalcemia include:

confusion or memory loss
muscle spasms
numbness and tingling in the hands, feet, and face
muscle cramps
weak and brittle nails
easy fracturing of the bones” 

Don’t worry tho the med team are on it and I’m eating plenty of cheese (which I love, !)

So lets look at some of the topics I can hopefully line up for you.
Aural Sex, storytelling and orgasm denial, a good little exercise for submissives, or anyone who enjoys a bit of self pleasure!
Slidy Fingers
Doggie Style
G-Spot O, for Orgasm
Temeparature Play, turn up the heating, get out the ice
Love Balls (well that could mean many things!)  (Look up Love Balls and you’ll find a girls online game, but I’ve NEVER EVER called them ‘jiggle balls’ in 50 shades style! They are and should always be Ben Wa Balls, unless they are not!

So bare with, and in the meantime enjoy The BDSM Files from my good friend and Regular Blogger MrsWolfie

A rough kinky guide & more to Telford (UK)

I’ll not lie,  most events BDSM related in the Midlands are NOT in Telford and at times living here and trying to be in the kink scene are tough.
 (Note there are several other towns across the world called Telford. Confusing isn’t it!)

Many munches or meetups centre round the bigger events, clubs or trade shows in Birmingham Bizarre Bazaar known as the BBB. Or are more remote events, online shops or not in the area. 

Telford Events are usually organised and announced on the Adult Social Media platform Fetlife. 

There’s not a lot in Telford in way of events. The main Telford Fetish  munch is small, but friendly and held in Midlands adult and LBTQ+ friendly pub slightly away from the centre of town, and not well served by public transport. 

The small much is however very friendly, and welcoming and worth a visit if its running (again most are currently shut due to Covid)

Online the Munch Group has close to 300 members presumably from in and around Telford. Quite often more mobile members crossover between munches. Not all of these people attend the munches. At a guess many of the members are lurkers. The actual attendance is between 12 and 20, although I’ve heard there’s been closer to 30 in the past.

LBTQ+ there is an active but small public group on social media, that pre lockdown

Going Outside. Particularly if you have a car, there are many opportunities for outdoor, remote play, occasional derelict buildings. (obviously be safe!) remote areas of woodlands, b road tracks (make sure they are not farm tracks) and lay-bys 
The opportunity for some outdoor play, or photoshoots is good.

Shopping. During Covid online adult toy stores such as Love Honey have seen a huge increase.

An independent couple friendly Adult Boutique named Romeo & Juliet’s Licensed  Adult Store  selling clothing, toys and peripherals closed in 2018. I’m in agreement here that Telford could be so much better for BDSM.

Other events are held in Birmingham and Wolverhampton, and I’ve been offered lifts to these if and when things change and it becomes possible. Having not attended I cannot write about them however this post is about Telford itself, not its surroundings.

A small Ann Summers store operates in the Telford Town Centre

There are a few hotels listed as Adults Only, in the area but no real boutique hotels similar to the Hotel Pellirocco in Brighton, which I rate as a standard for good ‘play’ hotels to aim for.

While swinging in no way suggests links with BDSM it preliminary research suggests that Telford has a fairly active swinging scene (I’m almost certain some of my neighbours swing that way!) And the UK TV broadcaster Channel 4 (renowned for its colourful productions) is currently (Aug2020) airing a program titled, yes you’ve guess it. Swingers!

Dogging certainly happens in Telford, again not BDSM but part of the sexual steaming pot of the area! Frequent topic on Adult Social Media forums.

Just Get Naked.
For those that just enjoy not wearing clothes Telford offers a naturist club again located on the Outskirts of Telford

The very very dark side of Telford Illegal Activities

Telford is an area of relative financial poverty. Its reputation and links for underage gangs, including forced prostitution, trafficking. While these gangs have been found, arrested and imprisoned there are rumours that elements of abuse are still current.
Sexual abuse, control of minors, enforced drug taking, or any form of non consent are in no way part of a healthy bdsm scene or lifestyle.
Those in any community who abuse others or the law should be reported and prosecuted.

Setting the Scene – The quick version

I Absolutely adore BigBold&Brights Get Ready with Me(or ‘etting the scene’!)

However my own experience has come from a different chaotic background of scene play. Not everyone can clear a bedroom, however there are a few few hacks, certainly if you are going to snap a few photos, or add music.

Shelving, a few simple map pins and rubber bands allow you to drape/hide shelves or a wardrobe in a matter of minutes. They’ll make zero damage and can easily be removed.

Should your bedroom contain a desk, as younger readers, or those in less than independent circumstances may well be, your not going to be able to clear the essentials, but again a drape, (make sure you turn off or unplug any non essential power and don’t cover sockets or transformers.

Lighting, if your lucky enough to have daytime play as I often did a curtain with a warmer colour orange or yellow can add a glow to a sunny room. Who said play had to be dark and moody! Keyring white lights can me coloured with a marker pen, even xmas lights on red can offer a mood enhancer.

Toys, I have a lot of toys, however keep the essentials handy, lube, maybe a set of cuffs and blindfold or bondage tape or perhaps some cloths pegs.

In the less private of dwellings these are a few items that can easily be packed away

If your lucky to have complete privacy in your own place, you can of course, mould it to your own tastes..

Music in particular is to peoples own taste. I know those that have scened in club music, gansta rap with explicit lyrics. I’ve started scenes with some passionate, non vocal. I’ve given a ‘foreplay massage’ to KennyG’s Breathless with the lights dimmed, and whipped a bound submissive in rhythm to Maddonna’s ‘Confessions Tour’ Album
There are plenty of pre created ‘playlists’ of Music of Sex, or top listing ‘Erotic Music’ available on youtube (probably best to acquire for your own use to avoid the ‘Amazon Sales’ ads halfway through your passion.)

Being able to control bass/audio can make a huge difference. If you happen to play music the option of an equaliser, even an App on a phone can make the difference. I used to have a fantastic Mini Hifi (now sold as Microsystems) with a manual sound control.  While I’ve not tested any of these apps, do let me know if they make a difference, IF you rely on your smartphone or tablet for music during play. Deeper bass can reverberate and trigger more sensation, as opposed to a tinny tune.

Be safe, Have Fun fellow kinky chums.

A remote photoshoot during lockdown?

As a creator and admin on a couple of groups on a well known popular Adult social networking site, yes they one that describes itself as “Like Facebook, but run by kinksters like you and me.”

“The question was is anyone interested in doing a photoshoot via Skype?”

 Now we live in an increasing age of instant visual gratification (on the whole) with KIK, Instagram, SnapChat and TikTok  and most chats are done on mobile phones with decent cameras, but for a photoshoot.
With Skype perhaps holding the most for those late night saucy chats..

However you and your model could use a wireless access software, if for instance you really know the person to screen share, or access their device. 15 Ways to Control an  Android Device   
Hmmm Control!  This does mean however they have remote access to the whole device, the same tactic taken nonconsensually to hackers and blackmail scams. So make sure you really trust the person.
Team Viewer is MultiPlatform

Certainly an interesting concept.

I’m not advocating anyone take any risks to their, or anyone else health, but thoughts have occurred to me of outdoor shoots, where there doesn’t need to be such close proximity. Or using remote shutters. Some are 5 metres signal or more. Without breaking the decency or current rules on daily exercise, that I think would be a challenge. I’ve used them during play seasons where I need to be in the shot too, or for the camera to be mounted steady on a grip, tripod etc. I’m a big lover of HAMA’s grip Tripods, sometimes known as Table Tripods or Camera Clamps, if you can get hold of them or similar, a phone mount can be added, or of course you camera can be clamped to a table, or the end of your bed, handy water pipe, tree,  and with a remote shutter you don’t have to be too close! Some of my own best photos have been with a tripod, or clamp mount and a remote shutter to keep my hands and direction free with my model or playmate.

Finding someone local to model would be my first challenge *GRINS*

There are some decent external 4K, vid and higher than 1080p webcams on the market that might do the trick, but your model, or yourself if posing at home would need the gear, and or software, or maybe use something other than Skype (Viber came up in my research). Of course these cost money so using your existing camera or phone may be a better idea, scroll down for more on that.
My own laptop has a 720p camera built in which is fine, for selfies and zoom meets etc but probably wouldn’t do much for a photoshoot if some decent images were wanted:)

Hmmm Clamps!

Even if you don’t have a fancy camera there are plenty of remote shutters for mobiles too! Those crappy mobile shots due to your shaking hands can be a think of the past.

Table Tripod, Desk Clamp



Sources  #techradar #HAMA  

Have fun, stay safe

And reply if you like this post.

Smoke over Troubled Water – Covid19 – The Planet and Humans

Just a quick response and thoughts to my good friend MrsWolfies post
Opinion: Face Masks In The West Carry Their Own Problem, Stigma

I’m used to public face masks , as a Londoner, and as someone with a long term chronic condition.
4 times a week myself and the girl don a mask during the ‘risk’ parts of starting and ending my treatment.
Not to mention the ‘adult element’ of a different type of facemarks as props in adult scenes. I wonder if the sale of THOSE has increased?

In London its fairly frequent to see facemasks among a large number of cyclists due to the pollution. You can visibly see and taste the pollution in London, for instance from high points looking over the city, or arriving in a busy railways station in central London.

While China was one of the first countries to enforce public face mask wearing it was already common in the busier cities due to pollution. If you remember China still has coal burning power you may understand this.
IMAGE: View Across London from the North, showing pollution over the City..
1914978 279076520150 1812756 n
As for the future.  IF our Governments actually LEARN from this rather than clinging to the ‘Go Back To Normal’. We WILL reduce the falsehood of global trade and commerce and learn to ‘look after ourselves’ before we help others. 
However this one a global scale seems hard to imagine as a reality.

IF WE as a country already had ‘In House’ Healthcare, rather than contracted, and transport we might be in a better economic sense to deal with the outcomes in the CURRENT situation

The psychological impacts are going to last a long time.

As I’m writing this, crude oil has a near negative value. Polluting airlines are lamenting their loss of business, and a cautious move towards humanity rather than Greed and Commerce seems to be happening.  While you may wonder what this has to do with the Corona Viruses, historically most disasters have had the most effect on areas of Mass Population, and this is not the first time that civilisations have been severely affected, not by natural disaster but by the transition of pathogens to areas of no resistance.

I for one, welcome, not the suffering and stress of individuals, but the wake up call to the fact we are NOT immortal as a species, nor are we the ‘top of the food chain, when we can easily be beaten by a simple virus.

We cope by doing little things that patch up the wounds, clapping, rushing to make masks and gowns, sharing food resources, but in the long term, we need to change.
Recommended Viewing and Reading

This Changes Everything

The Power Of Community – How Cuba Survived Peak Oil An Hours watch, but if your transport and imported food production is cut off. HOW DO YOU SURVIVE AS A COUNTRY?

NHS PLC  There’s no way we will now get a National Health Service that is fully State Run.  Since the introduction of Trusts and Centralisation of services, it seems an impossible future:(

I’ll finish with a quote from one of my favourite bands:

What would you leave behind when all your fields are dead
When your territories are dried out and your cities drowned and swept?
What would you leave behind when those who bear your name
Are born in that place that you wrecked?
What would you leave behind when you’re no longer there?

To deny or to despair
They’re really just the same
And everything between
It means we have to change
Cos when a one forgets
Their world begins to fade
And all the shapes and shades
That made their colours see
Well they suddenly turn grey
Then they’re no longer there

Toy Storage a personal perspective from a Dom

Inspired by 10 Shades and Me I thought I’d throw some  of my own Toy Storage ideas into play.

From A Dom side of things, its frustrating to have to rummage for ages, especially if your play time is limited and needs to be spontaneous.
Personally I’m working to slowly make the room more play friendly, perhaps a challenge given both our disabilities and busy lives.

The Top Drawer, next to the bed gets the basics, lube, a few small items etc. For those occasional cherished quickies. Items such as the claw (an extendable back scratcher), glass toys, etc get the honour of The Top Drawer!

In an ideal world I’d have a rack of toys handily on display in the bedroom/any room come dungeon.

Unfortunately we don’t all have this luxury.

For me.  Drawstring bags and Zip Bag Cheap as chips and great for small floggers, rope, and come in varying sizes.
Many toys already come in their own drawstring bags.
Small bags can be hung inside cupboard doors for easy access.
Tends to be used for, smaller vibes and plugs.

IMG 9660
Cheapest imports come from AliExpress or eBay, Amazon, although other retailers of course are available.  While I advocate buying local, most big chains will ship in from cheap in China. Of course for drawstring bags you COULD make your own, if you have some basic skills with a needle and thread.

Pros, you need to organise stuff, easy to carry/hang. Easy to keep a ‘ready bag’ for play if needs be with small toys/lube sachets etc, maybe a claw
Cons. Generally not waterproof, tend to get dusty.

Dry Bags, go to any large camping supplies and you’ll find dry bags in various sizes from small to massive for storing rope etc.

While I don’t use these for toys etc. ( I have other interests) Available from many retailers from dirt cheap on Aliexpress, they are available online from Sports Direct (see link above etc.
Great if you do outdoor play, need to transport stuff that really needs to stay dry. Keeps your gear dry.

Ideally for ‘stuff that can go in a bag’.

Toolboxes,  for the discerning Dom toolboxes look masculine. I have 3 Stanley Workzone similar to this, and some go under the bed, some go in the wardrobe (trying to minimise space)
They also have the advantage of being stackable, and lockable if needs be.
Tends to be used for – Rope, Longer Floggers, Cuffs, padlocks, etc

IMG 9662

Pro’s looks masculine and chunky. Good for rope, long floggers bondage tape etc. Easy to load into a car/lockable.

Con’s other than someone thinking your a DIY genius or asking why there’s toolboxes in your bedroom (IF they happen to look in your cupboard under the bed) We do get the odd cleaner but they aren’t usually bending down to ogle under the bed!

Get dusty (as do all things)

So different Dom/subs or Tops/bottoms will have different solutions.

If your into age play, a kids toy chest  or ottoman might be used, if your into Medical Play, maybe a traditional Doctors bag and white coat (I own the latter) despite not being heavily into medical play!

I have friends in the scene that have the luxury of creating a themed play room or area geared to whatever type of play they prefer, wether its suspension in the attic or a dungeon in the basement!
And if thats possible, why not!`

Thank you for reading, you may see this entry Xposted to my other journal, but if you see any of my work copied and it looks like its not credited, let me know.
Wishing you a spanking good amount of happiness in this bleak climate!

(Coming soon, someone asked me at a Munch, What do you Like?)

Continue reading Toy Storage a personal perspective from a Dom